This post will be dedicated to aggregating thoughts that occured over a period of time.
Thought Train 1 :
Do not assume that people perceive the way you do.
Optimism, Cheerfulness, Friendliness, faith in people/situation.Are much needed behavioral characteristics that need to be imbibed in me.
Thought Train 2 :
Major problems right now:
-> Internet abuse. Use of Internet when feeling down. Conflict of emotions.
-> Values not well internalized. Values not well defined.
-> Behavior needs to be more value based that judgmental. Data should be taken with a grain of salt. Verify, verify, verify.
-> Not internalized values need to be FACED with rationalizing, repeating values plans, understanding it WITH the drawbacks. Guilt, fear should not be used to implement change in behavior.
-> Relapse happens when values are not internalized. So face the conflict by reaching the depth of conflict.
-> Also change of state is a major problem. States are very difficult to change i.e do make an effort to plan the changes in advance e.g. Do not sit on the CPU, talk when change in expected. I think this can be done with moments of silence.
It seems, ones behavior is on a emotional autopilot for most of the time. This time is the one that I hate if it is in conflict with what I intellectually want to do.
Thought Train 3 :
Is this a Summary of motivation?
Seriously, there needs to be undeceitful autonomy.
Working towards procedural improvement rather than result oriented focus.
Trouble is that the efficacy of procedure can only be shown by results, strange dilemma.
So what to do? Silence.......*Birds Chirping*
My infinite Internet cycle: Deals (Uncertainty fun; Same as gambling), Mirror Neuron Art (Movies, Music, Manga, Anime, Youtube), Games, Social Snooping, Surfing in flow…… no remorse, no worries just flowing.
Productivity = 0; Waste of time = 100%
Thought Train 4 :
Seriously need a teacher. Reverence, Trust, Feedback.
Sometimes a loss of efficiency while working is better than working with an increase in efficiency at the cost of long term harm(vagueeeeeeeee)
Intellectually driven needs are fostered in silence and periods of self reflection.